Jonathan Crane's Journal
by scarlett onyx
Summary: There's not much to do in Arkham. So when the doctors tell Jonathan Crane to start writing a journal, he decides to try it out.
1. Chapter 1

5/8

I'm starting a journal.

The doctors say that this will be therapeutic for me.

Writing down my thoughts.

I don't know about that, but I have to get this out of my head.

Am I going insane? No.

The dreams are back again.

Every night almost.

They're there. People from the past, the present, it doesn't matter. They torment me endlessly and I can never wake up until the dream has run its course.

I haven't had such nightmares in a long, long time.

I thought I had forgotten. Forgotten those days…

Why can't they just leave me alone?

But no…nothing ever leaves me alone.

The pain just keeps coming back and it will never leave.

Nevermore…

The doctors are wrong.

This is not going to be therapeutic.


	2. Chapter 2

_5/8_

_I'm not sure why I continue to write in this stupid journal. In my opinion, it may do far more harm than good, and yet I continue. Ah, well. Something at least a bit interesting happened today. _

_An orderly exploded. _

_Those idiot doctors have yet to determine the cause, I suppose, but I suspect it has something to do with the fact that the Joker has been allowed to mix with the general population here. _

_And they call themselves 'doctors'._

_Fools, the lot of them._

_But I digress._

_The dreams have decreased somewhat. I now only have a few a week, if that. This is a relief…yet also a let-down._

_It's as if I am addicted to the very thing destroying me, and now, while I am happy that my tormentor is gone, I somehow miss it as well._

_But why would I miss it? Maybe it's because when I feel fear, well, at least I'm feeling something_.

Well, it does no good to think on such things now.

I have to go, 'group therapy'.

They might as well call it 'group argument'.


	3. Chapter 3

5/10

Better day today. Tetch was dragged in this morning. He can be annoying, but I have to admit that it's nice to have someone to play chess with. Nygma would be fine if he wasn't such a sore loser. News too: I don't know if this is just one of Tetch's daydreams but he says that there's a new rogue in town. At least that's what I've discerned from his nonsensical language. We'll see.

The Joker's been detained again, I suppose the doctors may have a bit of sense in them after all…

Harley Quin doesn't seem to be doing very well in the absence of her 'puddin' as she puts it…perhaps she fears being alone?

Since Tetch has arrived, the doctors again believed it therapeutic that he should be placed in my cell.

This means I get no peace, but at least I'll have someone to talk to. Just as long as he stays away from this journal…


	4. Chapter 4

5/15

Late entry. Haven't had time to write much lately…what with barely any sleep and Tetch being everywhere at once, I've barely had a moments peace, let alone time to write anything coherent down.

Tetch must be the most annoying individual on the face of the earth. He talks a mile a minute, (so does Harley, but at least it's in plain English), and on top of that, he seems to think that I'm his best friend.

Last night, I finally collapsed onto my bed and closed my eyes, hoping Tetch would get the point. Thankfully, he did…and I was allowed a few moment's rest before he started talking in his sleep. He continued to mumble about 'jabberwocks' and mome raths and would not cease his ramblings until I threw a shoe at him. Today, he has refused to speak to me and I'm trying not to look too happy about it, lest he decides to lift my 'punishment'. I'd much prefer this stony silence to 'off with his head' and all that nonsense.

On the down side, this means I cannot ask Tetch if he knows anymore about this 'new rogue' he'd been talking about. I must confess, I am a bit curious. I even asked around a bit to see if anyone else has heard anything. Pam doesn't know anything about it, and Harley was much too distraught to help (Joker's still in solitary), even Nygma doesn't know who it is (although I suspect he is just as curious as I am-not wanting to be the last to know some potentially interesting news). Well, I suppose all I can do is wait until something happens, or until Tetch stops giving me dirty looks and muttering 'jabberwocky' at me every time I walk past him.


	5. Chapter 5

5/16

Tetch is talking again. This is both a blessing and a curse. A blessing because he's told me all he knows about the mysterious "new rogue" and a curse because now he won't shut up about it.

Unfortunately, all Tetch knows isn't much. All he said was that some rumors have been circulating lately that point to a possible new super villain in the down-town area. Things have gone missing, and no one has seen anyone or anything around the valuables. They're just…gone. I myself find this to be a bit far-fetched. I mean, this is Gotham. Someone is _always _awake, meaning someone, sometime, must have seen _something._

But lo and behold, Tetch can't be lying. The Arkham staff _finally_ got a new TV for the rec-room, (to replace the last one Joker blew up) and I just watched the news.

According to Summer Gleason, the Second National Bank was robbed last night.

No one saw anyone go in or out but the security cameras mysteriously shut down around ten o'clock. No employees were there as it was after hours, and the night guard was found unconscious near the entrance to the main vault. He remembers nothing. Over half a million dollars was stolen. Apparently the G.C.P.D. could find no trace of the thief besides a small silver disk-like object- much like a shuriken. And now half the populace thinks there's a ninja on the loose.

I think whoever it is, they got lucky. I wonder if the Batman knows of this…probably. We'll see how our new "super villain" does against him.


	6. Chapter 6

A/N: realized I should probably be doing this…J…

Disclaimer- I do not own Jonathan Crane, Arkham Asylum, Poison Ivy, Joker, or Gotham City.

5/23

It's been awhile.

I've been in solitary for the past week.

Apparently attacking an inmate isn't considered "good behavior".

It's not like I didn't have a _reason_ for my actions…I mean, how would _you _react if the second the Joker got out of solitary, he tries to trip you every day for a week?

And then adds insult to injury?

That grating laugh was just too much.

Anyway, they wouldn't let me take this journal to 'the hole' because apparently, it's "dangerous" now. (What did they think I was going to do, _paper-cut_ them to death?)

All that to say this- about the minute I got out, I was transferred to the rec-room and it was literally _buzzing_ with talk about the so-called "new rogue" who's been all over the news for some time now.

Curious, I pulled Pam aside and asked her about it. She told me that the new girl-yes, it's a female-was brought in this morning after a lengthy chase involving the police, two S.W.A.T. teams and the Batman. Apparently, the new villainess still had some fight in her, though, because one of the guards that was supposed to bring her to her new cell go a bit too friendly and WHAM! She's in solitary and he's in critical condition.

Everyone's a good deal stirred up about this, and I…well I must say, I'm feeling a bit smug. Whoever this new rogue is, I was right in my reasoning that she wouldn't stand up well to the Batman. Two S.W.A.T. teams, the police, _and _Batman? Well, she's just luckier than I thought.


	7. An Introduction

**Disc: don't own characters or Arkham except Melinda Downey. **

Friday

Rumor has it that today we are all going to meet the 'new girl' in town.

Oh, joy.

I hope she isn't insufferably annoying. At any rate, I can't do much about it at the moment, anyway. I was _supposed_ to formulate an escape plan with Eddie today, but of course, the doctors switched the schedule so group therapy takes the rec-room slot. I thought we were supposed to get exercise? Learn to 'play well' with others? But _no…_ Anyway, one of the idiot guards is yelling at me. Will finish this later.

Jonathan Crane sighed and leaned down to shove his journal under a pile of books he knew would never interest Jervis.

"Get moving, Crane!" the guard snapped once again as the Master of Fear straightened up. Jonathan turned to the man and gave him his best 'I-am-superior-to-you-in-every-way' glare. "I am coming." he said, his voice filled with more ice than Mr. Freeze's cryo-habitat. "There is no need to shout."

The guard blinked, wavering slightly beneath the Scarecrow's cold stare. "Well…come on, then…" he muttered under his breath, not half as loudly this time. The guard opened the door and held it as the Scarecrow strode out, then took the much thinner man by the arm and led him to the door of the group therapy room.

Bored already, Jonathan shrugged the man's hand off and pushed open the door. The room was filled with all the usuals: Harley Quin sat, bouncing on a chair while talking to Poison Ivy, or 'Red' as the blonde called her. A little ways from them, a short blonde man-The Mad Hatter, sat, talking quietly to the Riddler. A few people were missing, the Joker was in solitary, and Two-Face was still at large, but the thing that puzzled Jonathan was the complete absence of the 'new girl'. Not that it was a let-down by any means that she wasn't there. It was just that new people swept into Arkham occasionally, but a new _rogue_, now that was a different matter.

"Jonathan!" called a voice from the left side of the small circle of folding chairs where the rogues were seated. "Over here!"

The Master of Fear turned to see the Riddler waving at him and patting a seat beside him. The Scarecrow shook his head slightly. For all the times that they'd sat next to each other over the countless therapy sessions they'd been forced to endure, Edward Nygma still felt the need to show Jonathan exactly where his seat was. Jonathan began walking towards his chair and Jervis Tetch bounced excitedly in his chair, looking eager to say something. It wasn't until the Master of Fear sat down that Jervis blurted, "She's not here! But she's coming! I overheard Dr. Leland say it and…"

Jonathan waved a hand to silence the Englishman. "I know…I figured as much. I have eyes too, you know."

The Riddler raised an eyebrow. "Well. _Somebody's _grumpy today…" The Master of Fear ran a hand over his face and turned to the Prince of Puzzles. "Sorry…just tired, I guess."

"Not nervous about meeting the new girl, are you?" Eddie smirked, leaning towards Jonathan.

"No!" the Master of Fear snapped, leaning away from the Riddler. "I most certainly am _not_. As a matter of fact, I don't care if she even comes."

The Riddler laughed.

"I don't know…" Jervis mused, looking into the distance. "She might be nice…"

No sooner had he said those words than there was a shout from the hallway.

"Don't you manhandle me, you overgrown thug!"

THUD.

"Ow! Get your filthy hands _off_ me!"

There was another noise that sounded a lot like a very hard slap, ending with a pained sounding yelp. "That's right! You want to end up like your buddy in the infirmary? Then by all means, try me!"

Suddenly the door burst open and two guards entered, half-dragging a young woman into the room.

Instantly, Jonathan began to analyze her, looking for signs of possible fears and weaknesses.

The woman's hair was a dark chestnut color, nearly black, as if it couldn't decide if it wanted to be black or brunette. She had light skin, on the verge of a pale color, except for her cheeks, which were flushed with anger. She wasn't ugly, even Jonathan noticed that, in fact, she would have been quite attractive if she stopped baring her teeth at the guards. The woman was slender, but looked about average height, not tall at all. All in all, she looked like an average person. Except for her eyes, which flashed with fury. Even from his distance, Jonathan could see that they were a deep gray color. _Interesting…_

The guards brought the woman over to the circle and pushed her into a chair, hastily turning to leave. She glared at them and then turned to the group of rogues, who stared back at her with various expressions.

Harley's eyes were wide with interest, Pam looked mildly amused, Jervis looked curious-but then he always did-, Eddie looked smug, and Jonathan? He simply raised an eyebrow, the rest of his face expressionless.

Suddenly the seemingly powerful young woman of a few moments ago looked decidedly uneasy. But the look passed quickly, and Jonathan wondered if he was the only one who had seen it. Now, the woman wore an expression akin to the Master of Fear's. Fake non-interest.

"Hello." she said, flatly, seemingly testing the waters.

There was an awkward silence for a moment. Then, as usual, Harley broke the stillness.

"HI! I'm Harley Quin! But call me Harley! Everyone does! What's your name?"

Seemingly taken a-back by Harley's sudden outburst, the woman stuttered, "My-my name is…" Jonathan smirked and the woman turned, catching the look. Straightening up, she said boldly, "My name is Melinda Downey. Nice to meet you, Harley."

Harley grinned, pumping Melinda's hand up and down. "I saw ya on the news! Your rogue name's 'Roulette', right?" Melinda nodded and turned to the other rogues. "Hello…" Eddie said, sidling up to her. "_I_ am Edward Nygma, better known as the Prince of Puzzles, or simply, the Riddler. Doubtless you've heard of me?" Melinda laughed, shaking the Riddler's hand. "Of course of heard of you! Can I call you Eddie?"

Eddie blinked. "Why…yes, of course…."

"I'm Jervis Tetch!" the Mad Hatter blurted, pushing Eddie slightly out of the way. "The Mad Hatter…but call me Jervis!" the Hatter blushed and Melinda smiled at him. "Ok, Jervis. Nice to meet you."

She turned to the red head behind her. "I am Pamela Isley…Poison Ivy." Poison Ivy stated. "But you may call me Pam. And by the way…I'm probably the only sane one in this bunch."

The Riddler glared at Pam, mumbling, "She really isn't…" under his breath.

Melinda raised an eyebrow, but nodded, turning to the Master of Fear.

"And you are?"

Jonathan crossed his arms. "Do I honestly _need_ an introduction? I am Professor Jonathan Crane, PhD. Otherwise known as the Master of Fear, the Lord of Despair, in a word-Scarecrow."

Melinda quirked an eyebrow again. "_Really_?" she drawled, looking Jonathan up and down. The Master of Fear felt his cheeks flush slightly and frowned at the woman. "Yes, 'really'."

She smirked and sat down next to the Riddler who grinned. "Ok, then, Scary. Nice to meet you too."

Jonathan ground his teeth together. 'Scary'? _'Scary'?_ _How dare she…_

But just as he was about to open his mouth and give this new upstart his exact opinion of her, the door opened again and Dr. Leland, looking a bit rushed, strode into the room. "Alright everyone, I see you've met our new patient. Now lets begin."

**a/n: ok, so this is the continuation of the journal. As you can see, I decided to mix the journal entries with bits of real time so it would be more interesting and easier to write. Hope you like it! **


	8. Love spat?

**Disc: don't own characters except for Melinda. I don't own Arkham, either. (wish I did)**

_Tuesday_

_I have been extremely irritated of late. That stupid 'new girl'-Downey, has been on my nerves from the moment I saw her. And to make matters worse, Eddie is convinced that she and I are destined for each other. I mean, really. 'Destined'? That is ridiculous. And yet, I cannot get him to shut up. I believe he thinks himself some sort of 'peace-maker' between myself and Downey. Again, ridiculous! An outrage! I can't believe that he would even_

"Hey, Scary! What're you writing?"

Jonathan Crane scowled, setting aside his pen and snapping his journal shut. "That is absolutely none of your business." he scolded, glaring at the woman who had dared to disturb his writing.

Melinda Downey, who had, in fact, dared to do such a thing, looked unconvinced. "Uh-huh…I bet I know what it is."

She paused for a few seconds, but Jonathan refused to answer.

"It's a _diary._ Isn't it?" she asked, dragging out the word 'diary' and grinning as she watched the Master of Fear turn red.

"It is most certainly _not_!" he snapped. "It is a _journal_."

Melinda smirked. "_Right…_"

"It is!"

"Well, well, well…" another voice joined in. Jonathan looked up to see Edward Nygma sidling over to them. "Are we having a lover's spat?"

The Scarecrow bit his tongue to keep from growling at the Riddler, then pointed to the offending person. "_She_ is annoying me."

The Riddler smirked. "Is she?" he leaned closer. "I think you like it…"

Jonathan stood up, drawing himself to his full height. "And _I_ think you are mistaken! I do not like her, or anybody else!" He stomped off, sitting down in a chair far away from Melinda and the Riddler.

"Good grief, is he _always_ like that?" Melinda asked, shaking her head.

"Not always." Eddie replied, sitting down in the vacant seat the Scarecrow had left. "He's just cranky, that's all."

Melinda raised an eyebrow. "Maybe it's because you seem to think that he and I belong together."

The Riddler grinned. "You agree with me then?"

"No!" Melinda said immediately. "He's just as annoying as he claims I am. Just this morning, he cut in front of me in the breakfast line. And I _know _the food isn't that good. He did it just to annoy me!"

Eddie smiled. "Or…maybe he did it just to get you to notice him!" he sang.

Melinda made a face. "Bluck, no way!" She glared at the Master of Fear across the room. Jonathan looked up, glaring right back.

"See?" she asked, turning to Eddie. "I don't like him, and he doesn't like me. And that is that." Eddie grinned larger. "Denial is the first ste-ep!"

Melinda glared at him. "Oh…go do a cross-word puzzle or something!"

The Riddler watched her as she stormed off to the corner opposite the Scarecrow.

_They'll get together._ he thought to himself. _They just need a little help, that's all._


	9. Breakout?

_**Disc: don't own characters except for Melinda**_

_Thursday_

_Downey is still being her insufferable self and to make matters worse, Tetch found my journal! Luckily, I caught him before he could read it, but I know he was just about to open it. You can be sure that I had a few choice words for him! Right now, he's sulking in a corner of the cell and giving me dirty looks. Well, I don't care. It serves him right for trying to look into my private affairs! And as if that wasn't bad enough, the idiot doctors decided to place Downey directly across the hall from my cell! The nerve! I can't even look up anymore without seeing her there…doing things. Like right now, for instance, she's reading. But I know she's staring at me! I can feel it. Still…I wonder what she's reading…_

"Um…Scary? Why are you staring at me?"

Jonathan Crane blinked, then scowled, furious that he'd been caught.

"I was not staring at _you_." he said loftily, crossing his arms. "I was just wondering what you were reading…that's all."

Melinda raised an eyebrow. "Sure…it's some of Poe's work."

Before he could stop himself, Jonathan asked, "You like Poe?"

She nodded. "Yep. I managed to get a guard to bring this for me."

"Oh, really?"

Melinda nodded again.

Curious, despite himself, the Master of Fear asked, "Did you bribe him?"

Melinda rolled her eyes. "No…I threatened to break his arm. He was pretty cooperative after that…"

"Ah."

"Well, would you look at that!" came a voice from near them. "Melinda and Jonathan. Actually having a conversation? It cannot be!"

Jonathan scowled. He'd forgotten that the Riddler's cell was right next to Melinda's, enabling him to hear the entire conversation.

The Scarecrow was about to give the Prince of Puzzles a piece of his mind when a guard strode down the hall, calling, "Lunch time, scum. Get ready."

XXXXX

"Nygma, get your hand away from my pudding.""_So-ory_, I figured you were too busy staring at Melinda to notice."

"For the last time, I am _not_ staring!"

"Yes you were."

Jonathan growled and turned to the Riddler. "I was not! For your information I was simply looking at…"

"Hi! Can I sit here, Eddie?"

"Sure!" Eddie said at the exact same time the Scarecrow said, "Absolutely not!"

Melinda rolled her eyes and sat down beside the Prince of Puzzles. "I was talking to Eddie."

Jonathan ground his teeth together. "Yeah? Well, so was I! As a matter of fact, I…" he trailed off, suddenly realizing something.

Melinda looked at him. "What?"

"You're eyes…" Jonathan said, "They're blue."

Melinda raised an eyebrow. "Excellent observation, Professor. What about it?"

"They were gray before!"

For a moment Melinda stared at Jonathan. Then she sighed and nodded. "Yeah…they do that when I'm mad."

"Change colors?"

"Yes. When I'm mad or upset they turn gray; the madder I get, the more gray they turn. Happy?"

Jonathan nodded, mentally filing the interesting tidbit away in his mind. Eddie, however, was nearly jumping up and down.

Melinda laughed. "They just change color…"

"With your moods!" Eddie exclaimed. "You're like a human mood ring!"

Melinda rolled her eyes, but nodded. "Sort of."

They ate in silence for a few minutes, and then Melinda leaned in a bit closer, whispering, "I'm going to break out tonight."

Jonathan had to cover his mouth with his hand to keep a short bark of laughter from ringing out into the cafeteria. "You? Breaking out? Impossible. You're new. You'll be dragged back before you can say 'Batman'."

Melinda glared at him, turning to Eddie. But the Riddler was shaking his head. "I'm sorry, Melinda, but I have to agree with Jonathan. Being so new…you won't get past the first guard patrol."

Glaring at both men, Melinda sat back, crossing her arms. "I'll show you. When you get up in the morning, I won't be here."

Jonathan rolled his eyes. "Sure. And pigs will fly."

**a/n: sorry, this is a bit shorter than the last one, but I wanted to put a new chapter up. Updates soon. And in case any of you were wondering, I got the idea for Melinda's eyes from my own, which do, in fact, change to gray when I am angry or upset. **


	10. Pigs Fly

_**Disc: don't own characters or Arkham. Melinda belongs to me.**_

_Friday_

_Just woke up. Breakfast is soon…I looked across the hall but I can't see Downey…_

_She's probably just in bed though. There's no way she could have escaped last night. I heard that they doubled the guard because they heard from one of the inmates that someone was planning a breakout. And she's one woman. An inexperienced woman. There is no way she could have gotten out of Arkham last night._

_Absolutely no way._

"Hey, Jonathan, did you here? Melinda escaped last night!"

The Master of Fear sat straight up in bed, tossing his journal to the floor.

"She _what?_"

Across the hall, Edward Nygma folded his arms and smirked. "She left. Gone. Poof. Escaped. I know, because she said goodbye to me on her way out."

"_What?"_

"You heard me. She said 'See ya later'. I suppose I could have gone too, but I wanted to see your face when you found out."

"No!" Jonathan said, rubbing his hands over his face. "She's gone? How did she do it? I have to know!"

Eddie laughed. "That's usually my line."

"This isn't funny, Edward!"

"Will you two be quiet?" came a voice from the bunk below Jonathan. "Some of us are trying to sleep!"

Flopping onto his stomach, Jonathan poked his head down over the edge of his bed and wormed his way over so it was about two feet from the Mad Hatter's.

"Did you see her?" he asked, shaking his head as the blood rushed to it. "Did you? Did she say goodbye to you too?"

Jervis scowled. "Hold your tongue! I was asleep! Just like I should be now!" The Hatter rolled over and pulled the blankets over his head.

Jonathan pulled himself back onto his bunk, banging his head on the ceiling as he did so. "Ow!"

_Oh, perfect. Melinda had proved him wrong, he was up way to early, and now he had a pounding headache! What next?_

~A Half-hour Later~

A piece of overly-done bacon went flying across the Arkham cafeteria. Jonathan, head down on the table, groaned inwardly.

"Huh. Pigs are flying. Guess you were right, huh, Jon? Melinda will escape when pigs fly…isn't that what you said?"

"Shut up, Eddie."

Another piece of meat went flying overhead.

"Bacon fight!" somebody shouted. The majority of the room looked over at Harvey Dent. There were a few snickers.

"Hey!" Two-Face growled. "I resent that!"

Another piece of bacon flew.

Jonathan seriously considered ducking under the table. She was gone. But how? Then the Master of Fear had an idea.

Grabbing the Riddler by the sleeve, he dragged the man under the table.

"Hey! What…Jonathan!"

"Shhhhhhh…." Jonathan whispered, face uncomfortably close to Eddie's.

"Ummm….Jon? Whatcha doin'?" the Prince of Puzzles asked, chuckling nervously.

"Tonight." Jonathan said, leaning closer. "Tonight, we're breaking out."

"Um…ok, why tonight?"

"So we can find Melinda! And find out how _she_ broke out! Oh, when I find her…"

"Ok, um, let me get this straight." Eddie said, leaning away from the Master of Fear. "You want to break out of Arkham to find Melinda to find out how she broke out of Arkham?"

Jonathan grinned, bouncing on his heels and smacking his head for the second time that day against the underside of the table.

"Ow. Yes! Exactly! Are you with me?"

Wanting to leave, himself, and not knowing what Jonathan would do in his current state if he refused, Eddie nodded enthusiastically. "Sure!"

Jonathan grinned even larger and clambered out from under the table.

_Tonight, he'd get out too._


	11. Planning

**Disc: don't own characters except for Melinda**

_Friday (later)_

_Ok, I don't know how she did it, but she did. Downey escaped. On her own. With DOUBLED GUARD on duty. _

_Oh, it's all so frustrating!_

_But she is in for a shock, because tonight, Eddie and I are escaping too. _

_So, ha. _

Feeling a bit childish at the last remark he'd written in his journal, but justified all the same, Jonathan Crane snapped the book shut and shoved it under his pillow. After all, he didn't want to forget it. He wasn't about to leave the little book here so Jervis could have free reign of it. Crawling over to the foot of his bed, the Master of Fear tapped on the bullet-proof plexi-glass and waited for a reply.

Nothing.

Tap-tap-tap.

Still nothing.

Frustrated that he was getting no response, Jonathan made a fist and banged hard on the glass.

"Huh? What?" came a loud whisper from across the hall.

"You fell asleep, didn't you?" Jonathan hissed.

"No…" came a sleepy voice as Edward Nygma sat up on his bed, rubbing his eyes and trying to flatten his hair, which was sticking up all over the place.

"Yes, you were!" snapped Jonathan. "Don't lie to me! We're leaving at midnight, remember?"

"Yeah…about that…"

"What?"

"Well, you see, Harv wanted to come too and…"

Jonathan smacked a palm against his face. "_Please_ tell me that you didn't tell him he could come."

"I told him he could come."

"Nooo!" Jonathan howled softly, scowling. "I _need_ to get out of here ASAP and it's going to be harder if he's constantly flipping that stupid coin of his!"

There was a low growl from the bunk above the Riddler, followed by a muttered, "I _can_ hear you, you know."

Eddie looked up, then at Jonathan, his eyes pleading. Two-face wasn't the easiest person to get along with, but for some reason, Eddie was able to. Jonathan would never understand that. Still, he knew that when the Riddler was friends with someone, he would stay by them. He, of all people, should know that. He respected Eddie, and since the Prince of Puzzles _had_ already said yes to Harvey…

"Oh, alright." Jonathan said, flopping down on his mattress again. "But I don't think we should take any…"

"Excuse me," came a voice from beneath the Master of Fear, "but I couldn't help overhearing…you _are_ planning to escape tonight?"

Jonathan ground his teeth together. "Ye-es."

"Oh, frabjous day! I'd simply love to join the dance!"

Jonathan looked over the edge of the bed at the Hatter below him. Jervis was looking up at him with an expression of such eagerness, the Scarecrow could have sworn that he looked just like a blonde puppy.

He sighed and glanced across the hall at the Riddler, who shrugged.

"Fine…the more the merrier."

Jervis clapped his hands together with joy and lay back contentedly on the bed.

Jonathan lay down as well, muttering to himself. "If we take anymore we might as well just be wasting time…"

A giggle drifted up from below him. "_If you knew time as well as I do…_"

**a/n: transition chapter**


	12. Meeting

**Disc: don't own characters except Melinda.**

_Monday_

_I am sincerely fed up right now. We did escape Arkham. After a long and tiresome night of coin-flipping and Carrol quotes. _

_I swear, if I hear one more quote from Wonderland, I will…I will…oh, I don't know what I'll do. Right now, I'm trying to think of where Downey might have gone. And it doesn't help that Eddie has decided to move in. Something about his previous lairs having been compromised. _

_Heaven help me._

Sighing, Jonathan Crane shut his journal. He'd find Downey later. Right now, he had to go out and get some more chemicals for some toxin. He was running dangerously low, and it was never good to go out without some form of protection in this city.

"I'll be back soon." Jonathan called to the Riddler before shoving the door open.

"Wait!" Eddie called, running up to the Scarecrow.

Jonathan stopped, annoyed. "What?"

"You forgot your coat." the Riddler said, handing it to the Master of Fear.

Jonathan rolled his eyes. "I don't really need it…"

"Yes, you do!" Eddie said emphatically, pressing it towards him. "It's raining, and if you don't take this, you'll catch a horrible cold, or worse, pneumonia! Take it!"

The Master of Fear sighed again and nodded, shrugging into the coat. "I'll see you later." He pushed open the door once more.

"And Eddie?" he said, almost as an afterthought.

"Yeah?"

"Thanks."

And then he was gone.

XXXXXXXX

Ten minutes later, Jonathan had sneaked into the main building of Gotham City's main pharmaceutical company. He'd just gotten into one of the bigger labs when he heard something.

The Master of Fear turned, scanning the room.

Nothing.

Scanning one last time, Jonathan shrugged and turned back to the cabinet in front of him which someone had so carelessly left unlocked. Smirking, he pulled the door open and reached for a bottle. Taking it out carefully, he held it up to the faint moonlight coming in from a window and read the label. Then, satisfied that it was what he had been looking for, he was about to leave when he heard it again. A soft noise, like a cat jumping onto a table.

Raising an eyebrow, Jonathan turned once more, holding the bottle carefully in his left hand.

Nothing.

Suddenly, he felt the bottle slip from his hand, but not downwards. Something was pulling it up!

Whirling back around, Jonathan stared at…thin air. But someone had just taken the bottle!

He didn't have time for this…

Angrily, Jonathan reached back into the cabinet and took another container. Whoever was playing this trick on him was going to be lucky enough not to suffer his vengeance today. Things were complicated enough now and he needed to get this and get out.

But suddenly, something tapped him on the shoulder and he turned again, once more with the second bottle in his other hand.

And once more, seconds later, it was taken from him.

Jonathan growled. "Whoever you are, you had better stop that if you want to live much longer!" he snapped.

A small giggle came from somewhere above him, followed by a sarcastic, "Oh, _really_?"

Startled, the Scarecrow looked up.

Lying flat on top of the tall chemical cabinet, a woman in a jet-black body-suit and a red mask with black edging looked down at him, her bright blue eyes sparkling with humor. "Hello, again."

Jonathan frowned. Then his eyes widened. "Downey?"

The woman smirked. "I prefer…Roulette." Turning, Melinda slid off the top of the cabinet and leaped lightly to the floor.

"How are you, Scary?"

Jonathan scowled. "How on earth did you get out of Arkham?"

Melinda smirked again. "A magician never reveals her secrets."

"Yes, but you're not a magician."

"And you, Scary, are much too curious."

She smiled at him, brushing herself off with blood red gloves. Her hair brushed across her face for a moment, but she pushed it away, tucking it behind an ear.

"Take a picture, it'll last longer."

Jonathan blinked. "Huh? Oh. I was not staring!"

Melinda rolled her eyes. "_Really_? Your jaw just naturally drops like that?"

Jonathan growled. "I have a cold. I was sneezing."

"Silently?"

"Goodnight…_Roulette_." Jonathan said curtly, turning towards the door.

"Goodnight, Scary!" Melinda replied, turning to the window. "I have a feeling I'll be seeing you soon."

And with that, she disappeared out the window.


	13. Coffee Shop Stalker

_**Disc: don't own anyone but Melinda Downey**_

_Wednesday_

_Found her. _

_She thinks she's got me right where she wants, but she's wrong. WRONG. She said that she'd 'see me soon'. Well. If I find her first I'll know exactly what she's planning. Because she's planning something._

_I KNOW she is. _

"You know, Jon-ay, technically you don't have to write in that since you're out of Arkham."

Jonathan Crane looked up from his journal, glaring at the Riddler.

"I know that! I'm just…used to it now. It's calming."

Edward Nygma smirked. "Really? Because you don't look too calm…"

"I AM CALM!"

Eddie held up his hands, backing away a bit. "Ok…ok…good grief. All this over a silly little argument…"

Jonathan sighed, setting his journal aside and standing. "Look, I'm sorry. But it's really bothering me! I mean, how _dare_ she! She's barely in the rogue's gallery and she has the gall to challenge _me_?"

"Well, technically, she didn't really 'challenge' you…"

Jonathan scowled, folding his arms. "Yes, she did."

The Prince of Puzzles rolled his eyes. "Alright, Jon. Whatever makes you feel better." Patting the Master of Fear on the shoulder, the Riddler headed for the kitchen. "I'm going to make a sandwich. And you should too. You've barely eaten anything all day and if you get any skinnier, your body won't be able to support its own weight."

Jonathan shook his head. "I'll eat later. Right now, I'm going for a walk."

Eddie sighed. "Alright, but it's pretty windy. If you blow away, don't blame me."

The Scarecrow rolled his eyes, grabbing his coat and shoving the door open. "I'll try not to."

The Riddler had been right, Jonathan grudgingly admitted to himself. Of course, Eddie _was_ right about most things…but still. This time he'd been right about everything. Only ten minutes or so from the time the Master of Fear had left the lair, his stomach began to growl. And it really _was_ windy. Grumbling to himself, Jonathan decided to duck under the awning of a nearby café. Maybe he'd go in, too, and get some soup. Eddie was probably at home right now, out of the wind, snuggled under a blanket with a bowl of chicken-noodle.

Lucky.

Before Jonathan's mind could remind him that if he hadn't decided to be moody and go for an impromptu walk, he could be doing the same thing, the Master of Fear pushed open the door to the small restaurant and ducked inside.

And then he saw her.

She was sitting on the other side of the restaurant, reading a menu and sipping coffee.

_Downey_.

Quickly, Jonathan ducked down behind a large potted fern, drawing looks from a few of the costumers, and considered his options.

He could leave, go home, watch Wheel of Fortune and eat soup with Eddie; walk out of here and continue his walk, pretending this never happened; or, he could stay and follow her like a stalk-_observer._

_Hmm…decisions, decisions._

Melinda Downey sat in her usual booth at one of the smallest cafés still in downtown Gotham and perused the menu, occasionally taking a sip of coffee from the mug on the table. All of a sudden, she thought she heard a rustling sound and glanced up, scanning the restaurant.

The fronds of the rather large potted fern by the doorway swayed gently and she noticed a few of the customers looking strangely at it.

_Huh_.

Well, this was Gotham City. And after living in it for a little while, Melinda was almost certain that pretty much anything was possible here. Maybe Pam was in the area…

Sighing, Roulette looked back at the menu, then realized she wasn't all that hungry. She'd only come here for coffee, anyway.

Draining the mug and leaving a generous tip for the waitress who'd brought it to her, Melinda Downey shrugged into her coat and headed for the doorway.

Jonathan waited until Melinda was out the door and halfway down the street before casually getting up from the table he'd moved after receiving several odd looks from the customers.

A few of them were still gawking, and Jonathan, not wishing to be gawked at, drew his black trench-coat around him with a bit of a flourish that he'd seen Eddie do on several occasions and strode towards the exit.

'_If they stare'_, the Riddler had stated once, _'give them something to stare at.'_

Feeling pleased with himself, Jonathan swept out of the café and slid into the shadows, trailing the still-visible Roulette.

Melinda moved quickly, occasionally glancing over her shoulder. She wasn't worried about getting mugged, but, even with martial arts and hidden weaponry on her side, she didn't like the thought of someone sneaking up on her, no matter if they succeeded or not.

And right now, she was getting the odd feeling that she was being followed. But that was stupid. Every time she looked back, there was nothing there. It was probably just the nerves that came with walking through Gotham after dark. Shaking her head, Melinda walked purposefully on, this time resisting the urge to look over her shoulder.

Jonathan chuckled darkly to himself. He was getting closer. She was turning off the main road to an old, but well-kept looking…._house?_

_Didn't she have a lair?_

Shaking his head, the Master of Fear crept closer as Roulette mounted the stairs to the building, and watched her pull out a key, opening the door and stepping inside, closing it behind her.

Jonathan chuckled again. _Yes! Now he knew where she lived, and…and…_

_Now what?_

The Master of Fear bit his lip, realizing that he hadn't thought that far ahead.

He knew where she lived. So…

Angrily, Jonathan kicked a pebble.

Well, she had said she'd see him soon. So maybe she wouldn't be too mad…but that was stupid. He was _not_ afraid of _her_. He was the Master of Fear! The Lord of Despair!

Yeah.

Feeling somewhat silly, Jonathan stepped out of the shadows, walking up to the house and up the few front steps.

He stood there for a moment and then sighed explosively.

_Now or never._

Raising a hand, the Scarecrow knocked on the door.

**a/n: it has been waaaaaaaaaaaay too long. I'm so sorry! But here's the next chappy! :D **


	14. New People

**Disc: don't own**

No sooner had Jonathan Crane knocked, than the door flew open. Expecting Melinda, he was about to say something when he saw who it was.

That was definitely _not_ Downey.

A tall, slim young woman with chocolate skin and dark brown hair stood in the doorway, arms crossed and one eyebrow raised.

"And you are?" she asked.

Jonathan stared for a moment before clearing his throat and smoothing his hair back. "I am Professor Jonathan Crane, Ph.D." he said regally. "And I wish to speak with Melinda Downey."

The woman leaned against the doorframe, unimpressed and looked Jonathan up and down. "You do, huh?"

"Yes."

The woman eyed him for another second before answering, "Alright then…Hey, Mel? Some skinny white boy is here to see you!"

The Master of Fear opened his mouth in anger. "_Excuse_ me?" But before he could get a chance to say more, Melinda came into view.

"Who? Ooh…Hi, Scary! Nice to see you again. I figured you'd follow me."

The other young woman looked from Melinda to Jonathan in confusion. "Wait a minute…he _followed_ you? Well, I can take care of _that_…"

She turned and glared at Jonathan with such a ferocity that he took a step back, reaching automatically for his fear toxin. "No!" Roulette said quickly before things could escalate. "No, that won't be necessary, Ali. I'm fine. And I think we both know that I can take care of myself if I have to."The Scarecrow had had enough of these insane women.

Scowling at the both of him, he prepared to turn on his heel and stalk out of the room. "Where're you going, Scary?" Melinda asked, stopping him. "After all the trouble you took to follow me, the _least_ you could do is stay and meet the family."

Jonathan glared at her. "I have no interest in meeting your _family_."

Melinda rolled her eyes, turning to her companion.

"Jonathan, this is Alise Parker. And Ali, this is…"

"Oh, I know who he is." Alise said, folding her arms again. "He's a skinny white boy stalker with a fancy name and an inflated opinion."

"OH!" Jonathan spluttered, thoroughly furious. "Let's get one thing straight, _Alise_. I am the Master of Fear! The Lord of Despair! I am SCARECROW!"

Alise nodded. "That would explain why Mel calls you 'Scary.'"

"YOU WANT ME TO SHOW YOU JUST HOW 'SCARY' I CAN BE?"

"THAT IS _ENOUGH_!" Melinda shouted, stepping between them. "NOW BOTH OF YOU STOP YELLING, OR SO HELP ME, I WILL _MAKE_ YOU STOP!"

Jonathan and Alise both turned to Melinda, surprised.

Melinda looked from one to the other and then smiled shakily. "Thank you. Now," she went on, taking them both by the shoulder and leading them through the lair. "who wants supper?"

_Wednesday (later)_

_Well, I found her again. Followed her from a coffee shop…and she fed me supper. She's a surprisingly good cook. Not that I told her that. But, of course, there's a downside. She has a rather insufferable roommate. And not Eddie insufferable. Just plain insufferable! She thinks she can boss me around and call me names…well. We'll just see about that. She better not push me too far, that's all I can say. Because Alise Parker does not know what she is dealing with._

Jonathan Crane closed his journal and sighed, rubbing his eyes. He knew he should get some sleep. Eddie had fallen asleep hours ago watching some all-night game-show channel and had slumped down on the couch, laying his head on the Master of Fear's knee. Jonathan sincerely hoped that the Riddler wouldn't start drooling.

Absentmindedly, the Scarecrow trailed a hand through Eddie's hair while he thought about what he would do next. Downey and Parker had to be taught respect, certainly. But then, lots of people did. Why was he so concerned about them?

Sighing again, Jonathan leaned his head back against the couch and closed his eyes. Maybe if he got a little shut-eye, he'd think of something…


	15. Alise Parker

**Disc: don't own Batman, or any related characters. Melinda Downey and Alise Parker belong to me.**

_Tuesday_

_In the lab at present. New toxin should be ready soon. Normally I'm good at being patient…to an extent. But now I'm hoping it will get done soon. I can't wait to try this toxin out, particularly because of its unique chemical compound made up of specifically tested hallucinogens and…_

"Hey there, Skinny."

Jonathan Crane took a deep breath, and, without looking up, said calmly, "Who let you in?"

Smirking, Alise Parker leaned against the doorframe. "I let myself in. Eddie's not the only one who can pick a lock."

The Master of Fear scowled, turning this time. "Look. I thought I made this clear. I don't like you, and you don't like me. So why, why, _why_ do you keep bothering me? And I believe I also previously stated that Eddie is the only one who is allowed to let himself in. Largely because, at present, he _lives_ here."

Alise rolled her eyes. "Look, Scary, I'm here because Mel is off looking for blueprints and I'm bored."

"Well, as long as your going to be here, can you go get me some coffee?"

Over the past couple days, Jonathan had observed that Alise wasn't a rogue. She roomed with Melinda, and didn't seem to be intimidated by the rogue's gallery. Apparently, she and Roulette went back a long way, but whenever Jonathan brought it up, Alise would just change the subject. As far as he could tell, Alise just helped Melinda out from time to time, kind of like an assistant, but not on the field. The Scarecrow understood this, having had an assistant before. But he hadn't seen Ulysses in a long time, and he hadn't been half as annoying as Alise Parker.

"Excuse me?" she was asking now, a hand on her hip.

Jonathan frowned. "Coffee. Now."

Alise raised an eyebrow and stepped closer to Jonathan. "Boy, you did _not_ just tell me to get you coffee."

"Yes. I did."

She folded her arms. "Let's get something straight, white boy. I am _not_, nor will I ever be, a maid. And I do _not_ 'get coffee' for pushy ex-professors. Got it?"

Jonathan glared at her for a moment. "Fine."

"Good. Now, if you had asked _nicely_…"

The Scarecrow stirred the vat of chemicals near him with a bit more vigor than necessary and growled. "Please get me some coffee."

Even without turning, he could _feel_ Alise's smirk.

"Good boy."

Several minutes later, Jonathan sipped his coffee in a rather dispassionate silence as he perused the charts he'd made for the correct description of a chemical. Alise roamed the room, looking at the different chemicals and beakers.

"Is this acid?"

Jonathan nodded. "Yes. Don't touch."

"I thought you dealt with hallucinogenics?"

"Every scientist needs a wide variety of chemical attributes."

"I see."

In the silence that followed, Jonathan found himself wondering what Alise's background was. Or what Melinda's background was, for that matter. Setting his coffee cup down, the Master of Fear decided to find out.

"So, how did you and Melinda meet?" he asked casually.

"College."

Jonathan smirked. "You're lying."

"And what makes you say that?"

"I'm a psychologist, Alise. I know these things."

"Uh-huh. So tell me, Mr. Psychologist, what _am_ I thinking?"

Jonathan rolled his eyes. "I'm a psychologist not a psychic. You tell me."

"Why?"

"Because I want to know."

"Too bad."

The Master of Fear frowned and reached behind him, pulling his mask and a small spray bottle from the counter beside him. "You know, I do have other ways of garnering information…"

But to his surprise, Alise remained unimpressed. If this was an act, she was good.

"So? You going to gas me, or what?"

Jonathan's frown deepened. "You're not afraid?"

She shrugged. "Why should I be afraid of some skinny white boy with a spray bottle and a potato sack?"

The Master of Fear growled softly. "You don't want to do that."

"Oh, really? And what will you do to me if I do?"

Jonathan wasn't sure what made him do it.

Maybe it was because she was so unimpressed, or a result of the repetitive name calling. Or maybe, it was the simple fact that she was making a fool out of him.

Whatever it was, Jonathan Crane gassed Alise Parker.

As the cloud of toxin dissipated, the Scarecrow quickly pulled his mask over his face, waiting for the delicious sound of screams to wash over him.

Alise coughed and spluttered, shaking her head and rubbing her eyes.

And then she crossed her arms and looked at him.

"Wait…I'm confused. Was that supposed to _do_ something to me?"

Jonathan blinked.

"But…but…how? Why didn't it work?"

Stalking over to a cage in the corner, he reached in and grabbed a large white rat by the collar, spraying it in the face with the remains of the contents in the spray bottle.

The rat squeaked and writhed for a few moments, jerking spasmodically until finally collapsing. Tossing it back in the cage, Jonathan glared at Alise.

"Who _are_ you?"

Alise smirked. "I'm Batman."

"What?"

Laughing, Alise shook her head. "Kidding! Good grief, man. So your toxin didn't work. Big deal! Maybe I'm just naturally immune."

Shaking his head, Jonathan clawed a hand through his hair. "'Naturally immune'? No…that would mean that you would have to have some sort of a natural absorbent…in your blood stream…"

"Well, I do heal faster."

Jonathan stopped his pacing and turned. "You what?"

"I heal faster. Not instantaneously by any means, but it's like…well, say you had a cold. Now for the average, normally healthy person, this cold would last two, maybe three days. For me, it's just one, and two if I'm really down."

The Master of Fear looked at Alise. "That could just mean that you live a healthy lifestyle."

Alise smirked, reaching up to pat Jonathan's face. "That's sweet, Hon, but I like my fries. Trust me. It's a blood thing. My…sister had it to."

The Scarecrow watched her for a moment. "Your sister?"

"Yes."

"You see her often?"

Alise looked up at him suddenly. "She's dead."

Slightly taken a-back, Jonathan said the only thing he could think of. "I'm…sorry."

Alise smiled. "It's ok. Definitely not your fault. Anyway." she said, suddenly changing the subject, "I better get home. I'll see you around, Skinny White Boy."

Jonathan scowled…but only slightly.

"Yeah. Oh, and Alise?"

She turned. "Yes?"

The Scarecrow rubbed the back of his neck and averted his gaze slightly. "Don't…tell Melinda I gassed you…ok?"

Alise smirked and nodded. "Of course I won't!"

Jonathan breathed an inward sigh of relief.

"After all, if I did, I wouldn't have anything to blackmail you with!"

The mental sigh stopped dead.

"See ya!"

And with that, Alise Parker skipped out the door.

**a/n: a small in between chapter, this takes place a few weeks after Jonathan meets Alise. I figured I'd give a taste of a background. Hope you like! And don't worry. Mel will be back soon.**


	16. The Explanation

**Disc: don't own jon, eddie, or gotham. I own Melinda and Alise.**

_Friday_

_Still nothing. I've stayed up all night researching that stupid problem with my toxin. There HAS to be a problem. There's no way that Parker is naturally immune. NO WAY._

"Hi, Scary!"

Jonathan Crane sighed and deliberately chose not to look up. "You know something, Downey, there's this thing called knocking. I understand that it's pretty well accepted among most cultures."

Melinda Downey rolled her eyes.

"Let me guess…" Jonathan continued, "You're bored."

Melinda smirked, walking over to the table. "Yes. I am."

Turning, Jonathan was about to make another snide remark when he actually looked at Roulette. She was wearing nicely fitting black jeans and a form-fitting dark blue top that brought out her eyes nicely. Her dark hair flowed loose around her shoulders and she brushed it away from her eyes.

"Didn't I tell you a picture would last longer? Or do you just have one of those silent colds again?"

The Master of Fear coughed, turning back to his lab table quickly. "You know, as much as I would _love_ to stay and chat, I am very, _very_ busy so if you don't mind…"

"Busy with what?"

Frustrated, Jonathan whirled. "With _stuff_, ok? Important stuff. Chemicals." He turned back to it and peered into a microscope.

"Oh, come on." Melinda persisted. "Just tell me? I'm really _really_ bored."

"Why don't you go find Alise or something?"

"She's out with her boyfriend."

Jonathan turned again. "Alise Parker has a _boyfriend_?"

Melinda rolled her eyes. "Yeah! Why, is that suddenly illegal, or something?"

Jonathan scowled. "No…"

"What are you testing, anyway? Don't you think your toxin is ready?" Melinda gestured at the cage of rats which was now filled with many still forms.

Jonathan shook his head angrily. "Well, it's not! I…tried it on someone…before…and she-_they_ didn't respond to it."

Melinda's eyes opened wide. "_Wait_ a minute…when did you test it?"

"Yester-a while ago."

"You tested it yesterday on Alise, didn't you?"

_She was too smart for her own good!_

"Um…"

Roulette grinned. "I _knew_ that's what she was doing…"

The Master of Fear raised an eyebrow, confused. "What do you mean?"

"Come on!" Melinda said, suddenly grabbing the Scarecrow's arm and pulling him towards the lab door. "I have something to show you."

Ten minutes later, Jonathan found himself being pulled through the door of Melinda's lair. "I don't see what we're…"

"Shhh!" Melinda hissed, looking hastily around. "If she's back, I don't want her to hear you!"

Jonathan was about to say something else but stopped, nodding. The last thing he wanted was another run-in with Alise Parker.

Melinda looked around a bit more and stuck her head in a few of the rooms. Finally, she turned and grinned. "All clear! Come on…"

Jonathan followed her down the hall, not really sure why. Maybe it was because she was so pushy, or that he was tired of testing toxins after a full night of no results. Or, maybe it was because he was actually interested in what she had to show him. Whatever the reason, the Master of Fear followed Roulette down the hall and around a corner.

Melinda flung open a door and flourished a hand through the opening.

"Ta-daa!"

Jonathan's jaw dropped.

Because beyond the door lay one of the most well-stocked laboratories he had ever seen.

"Is this…yours?"

"No!" Melinda said, laughing. "I deal with the weaponry. This belongs to Alise."

"But…she isn't a rogue…" Jonathan tried to step through the doorway but Melinda grabbed his arm again, stopping him.

"Just because she's not one of us doesn't mean she can't have a lab. And you can't go in there. I just wanted to show it to you. If Alise finds out that you were in there, she'll completely freak out."

Jonathan scowled. "Why did you show it to me if I'm not allowed to do anything?"

Melinda sighed as if the answer was completely obvious. "_Because_ I wanted to show you that she's not immune. At least not immune to the gas form of the toxin. If you injected her she might have a reaction, but it would probably only be a few minutes. Did she tell you about her fast immune system?"

The Master of Fear blinked. "Well, yes…but wait. I _knew_ it! She's not immune! But how…"

Melinda grinned. "Last night, I saw her mixing together something. Tell me, have you been missing a vial of toxin lately?"

Jonathan thought for a moment. _One had seemed to be missing last time he'd checked…_

"Possibly."

"Well, there you go then."

Jonathan shook his head. "So, what your saying is, that somehow, Alise Parker got her hands on one of my toxin vials and made herself an antidote, injecting herself with it before I gassed her?"

"Something like that, yeah."

The Scarecrow's eyes narrowed. "Oh, she is going to pay…"

Roulette shook her head. "Hey! It's not like she broke into your lair. Remember how you came here after you stalked me?"

"I was not stalking! I was observing! There's a difference!"

"Yeah, whatever. What I'm saying is, you were so upset when you walked out, that you didn't notice the vial you'd dropped. You were flailing your arms all over the place and it must have just fallen out."

The more Melinda explained it, the more it made sense. _Why hadn't he thought of that? Ok, so thinking that Alise had a secret lab where she secretly made a secret toxin to secretly sabotage him and make him stay up all night, secretly trying to make a secret toxin that would work on her was a stretch. And also an overuse of the word 'secretly'. But still._

_Now she would pay. Oh, yes. Once he got his hands on her…_

No sooner had he though this, than the door opened.

"_What_ is he doing here?"

Melinda blinked. "Oh, I was just showing him around the lair…"

"He saw my lab, didn't he?"

"You're not immune!" Jonathan blurted.

Both women turned to him, each raising an eyebrow.

"Well, she's not!" Jonathan said.

Alise shook her head. "I am if it's direct gas exposure."

The Master of Fear scowled. "I _know_ that! But you made an antidote! And that is just sneaky! Give me back my vial!"

Alise rolled her eyes. "No. It's mine now."

Jonathan considered this and then crossed his arms. "Fine. Keep it. I don't care. I'm going home. Thank you, Melinda, for at least telling me the truth!"

Melinda smirked. "You still can't go in there."

The Master of Fear blinked. "I don't care. I don't _need_ your lab. I have my own."

Alise grinned, picking up on the hint of jealousy in the Scarecrow's tone. Leaning closer, she smirked, "Mine's bigger."

Edward Nygma had just curled up on the couch to watch Wheel of Fortune when the door suddenly banged open and Jonathan Crane strode in, looking quite ruffled to say the least. Eddie smiled slightly. "Alright, what happened?"

Jonathan paused for a second, debating whether he should tell the Riddler or not.

"I made popcorn."

"Fine, so I was in my lab and Melinda just _waltzes_ right on in and says that she wants to show me something so I go to her lair and she shows me this _huge_ lab and it's Alise's but she won't let me in and then Alise shows up, but she was _supposed_ to be out with her boyfriend and says I can't have my vial back…and I _really_ want to get into her lab!" Taking a deep breath, Jonathan took some popcorn. _How dare that Parker taunt him! And Downey too, for that matter…_

The Riddler smiled and patted the Scarecrow's shoulder. "Look, it's ok…"

"You are absolutely right, Eddie!" Jonathan said, an evil grin spreading across his face. "Because _I _have a plan…"

**a/n: an explanation for Alise and a plan for Jonathan. The plot thickens…**


	17. Plan A and B

**Disc: don't own Jonathan and Eddie. Melinda and Alise are mine.**

"Jon, I'm not sure this is going to work…"

"SHH…it'll be fine."

"But…"

"_Shush_, Eddie."

Jonathan Crane carefully crept up to the back door of the old house and listened.

Silence. Just as he'd predicted.

Tapping Edward Nygma on the shoulder, he motioned to the lock. Eddie, who still remained unconvinced about the whole thing, shook his head.

Jonathan scowled and mimed something to the affect of 'I'm going to make you stay here until you pick this lock. And I can stay a _long_ time'.

After a bit of silent arguing, the Prince of Puzzles finally acquiesced and pushed past Jonathan, picking the lock with such ease, it was almost elegant.

The Master of Fear chuckled evilly and swiftly pushed the door open, pulling the Riddler in after him before he could protest. Swiftly trotting down the hall, the Scarecrow stopped and flung open a door.

And there it was.

The mother of all laboratories.

"_This_ was your 'plan'?" Eddie scoffed, looking around the Scarecrow.

Jonathan shook his head impatiently. "No…my 'plan' was for you to keep watch while _I_ go through this lovel-er, large lab."

Eddie frowned. "You want a lookout, get yourself a henchman. I have a deathtrap to work on."

The Master of Fear turned, his eyes almost pleading. "Oh, _please_, Eddie! If you help me with this, I'll…I'll get you some cookies!"

The Riddler raised an eyebrow, considering this.

"How _many_ cookies?" he asked, skeptically.

"Oh, lots! Lots of cookies. Whole packages!" Jonathan exclaimed, nodding quickly. The Prince of Puzzles considered briefly and then nodded, much to the Scarecrow's relief. "Fine. I'll be a lookout. But look fast, because I don't want to be here when Alise gets back."

"Of course, of course."

The Master of Fear ducked into the lab and began to peruse the shelves, opening drawers and flipping through notebooks at random. Pulling open a cabinet door, he saw a lone vial on one of the shelves. _His_ vial.

"I'll take that…" he mumbled to himself, snatching it and sticking it into his pocket. She wouldn't miss it. And after all, it was _his_ vial.

Wandering about the other side of the room, Jonathan decided to look at a few of the mixtures in the cabinet nearest him to see what they did. He was just reaching for a bottle when the Riddler dashed in.

"Jon! The bee is in the hive! The bee is in the hive!"

"What?"

"_Alise_, Jon!" Eddie snapped, exasperated. "She's back! And if we don't get out of here soon, we'll be…"

A door opened.

"Get down!" Jonathan hissed, crawling under a lab table and pulling the Riddler down with him.

Then he realized the door to the lab was still open.

_Maybe she wouldn't notice…_

"WHO'S BEEN IN MY LAB?"

Jonathan cringed. _She noticed_.

Then he saw it. A small back door that he hadn't noticed before, probably an emergency escape door. _If they could just make it…_

Gripping the Riddler's arm, Jonathan pointed to the door. Eddie shook his head furiously. "We'll never make it!"

The Scarecrow shook his head back at the Prince of Puzzles and pulled harder. Nervously, Eddie followed and Jonathan tiptoed as fast as he could to the door. Footsteps echoed down the hall as Alise walked towards them.

_Almost there…yes!_

Jonathan unlocked the door and threw it open, following the Riddler as he practically threw himself out into the alley next to the house. The Scarecrow shut the door swiftly once more and leaned against the wall, taking in big gulps of air.

"We did it!" he said, looking at Eddie. The Riddler nodded and grinned.

And then the door opened.

"_Well_, I had a feeling I'd find you." a voice said. Jonathan turned, trying not to look guilty as he looked at Alise. "But, I didn't think I'd see _you_, Eddie!" she continued, a note of surprise in her tone.

"He _bribed_ me!" Eddie blurted, "With _cookies_!"

Jonathan scowled. "Whose side are you on?"

The Riddler pouted. "Whichever side is her good side!"

Alise rolled her eyes. "What is _with_ you two? I'm not going to eat you. I suppose I should have let you explore my lab when I was there so you didn't break in. Still…you didn't touch anything, did you?"

"No." Jonathan muttered. "None of _your_ things, anyway."

Alise laughed. "You have your vial, then?"

"Yes. Yes, I do. And you're not getting it back!"

She shook her head. "Fine! It was taking up space anyway. Now, if you'll excuse me…" she stepped back inside the house, "I have work to do. Oh…and stay out of my lab. I might not be so courteous next time."

And with that, the door shut.

"Well…" Eddie said. "That went well."

But Jonathan wasn't listening. He was going to get back in there…somehow. But for now…

"Come on. A deal's a deal. Let's go get some cookies."

_Saturday_

_I got in the lab and retrieved my vial. Unfortunately, I had no time to observe the compounds she was mixing. Does she really have a lab like that just for entertainment? It seems so…_

_However, I will try to find out by plan B._

Jonathan Crane walked up to the door of Melinda's lair and knocked, grumbling to himself. He _hated_ plan B. After a moment, the door opened and this time Roulette stood in the doorway. "Hi, Scary!" she said, leaning against the doorframe. Biting back a sharp retort, Jonathan scowled and said, "Is Alise in there?"

Melinda raised an eyebrow. "Why?"

"Because I want to ask her something, that's 'why'!"

Rolling her eyes, Melinda called for Alise, and she came around the corner, dressed in a lab coat. "What? Oh, hi, Skinny."

Jonathan sneered at her and then quickly composed himself, looking the picture of casual curiosity. "I was wondering if…well, if I might…look in your lab for just a bit." he stopped for a moment and then forced himself to smile, his left eye twitching. "_Under supervision._"

Alise smirked. "Alright. Come on." Turning, she walked down the hall without seeing if Jonathan was following.

The Master of Fear drew himself up as tall as he could and stalked past Melinda, ignoring her smirk.

"See what happens when you play nicely?" she teased as he walked past. Resisting the sudden childish urge to stick his tongue out at her, Jonathan curled his lip and stomped down the hall.

Shelves of vials.

Dozens of chemicals.

Several large lab tables.

And at least two Bunsen burners.

Alise Parker's lab was _beautiful_.

"Lovely…" Jonathan murmured to himself as he perused the shelves.

"Thank you!" Alise said, grinning at him.

"I was _talking_ about the lab."

"Uh-huh."

The Scarecrow scowled and walked past her, deliberately bumping into her as he did. A picture on one of the tables caught his eye. A handsome, dark-skinned man with almond shaped eyes stared back at him.

"Your boyfriend, I presume?"

Alise snatched the picture and put it on another table. "Yes."

Jonathan rolled his eyes. "Don't worry, I'm not going to hunt him down or anything. I was just wondering."

"Yeah, well, you can wonder all you want." Alise muttered, ducking behind a lab table to pick up a vial from the floor.

The Master of Fear grinned evilly. "You seem…tense. Is the relationship not going well?"

"Shut up!" Alise snapped suddenly. "Nothing…nothing's going on! So just mind your own business, ok?"

Jonathan raised an eyebrow. She was actually _shaking_. He wondered why…

"Look." Alise said after an awkward silence. "I have a lot of work to do today…could you just come back some other time? Please." she looked in the other direction and started mixing a few chemicals aimlessly.

Jonathan nodded after a few moments and headed for the door. He would find out what was bothering her…

"Until then."

**a/n: took me awhile…hope you like. **


End file.
